A $50,000 Assumption
I went to a workshop for small business entrepreneurs this week entitled Good Advice in Tough Times. Organized by Vancity, a local credit union, this event was to support its members and their businesses.
We were each given a handbook full of tips and tricks to help us support our business during these sensitive economic times. We talked about the economy, cash flow, marketing and contingency plans. It was time well spent listening and learning, but more importantly it was about making connections.
I left with more than a handbook under my arm and business cards in my wallet. I had a renewed connection with myself and my business.
One presenter shared a story about a client of hers that caught my attention. This client had been concerned about a lack of cash flow in connection with the current economic environment. After further discussion with this client, she learned that he had not yet spoken to his clients. His assumption was that they had cut back on spending to manage their cash flow.
The next time they spoke he reported a cash flow of $50,000 after connecting with his clients. It turned out that they were still interested in his product. They’d just been distracted by their own concerns and had forgotten or not bothered to place their orders.
Communication by Design
Communication is imperative to survival. Things are not always what they seem — in the business world and in our personal lives.
This story reminded me of how easily we are influenced by our circumstances and we make assumptions to validate our perceived reality. Our brain is wired to fill in the blanks when we don’t understand something.
When this happens, most people are either living by default or afraid to ask questions. How can a person step beyond this habit?
The first step is to know what you want and assess whether or not you are receiving it. It’s that simple.
From there you will determine if you have made an assumption or are afraid to ask for what you want. Either way, keeping the lines of communication open is necessary to find out.
Be aware of your situation, look beyond it and ask questions. If you anticipate the question might be misinterpreted by the other party, share your observation and let them re-frame it.
When you make it about them and not you, people see that you are willing to take time and effort to listen to what they have to say. Good connections build trust.
Assumptions can kill a business and they can kill a friendship too. They cause us to live by default and accept what we can get, rather than creating and receiving what we want.
Making assumptions doesn’t only separate us from our clients and our personal relationships, it separates us from ourselves. We get less of what we want… and so do the people around us.
Here’s a challenge to you. Keep track of how many assumptions you make today… and how many you can actually validate.
Photo Credit: Kevin Dooley
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Patricia
Tess The Bold Life
Tony Single
vered
{ 24 comments }
Hi Davina – It is so great to have you back in my reader! It sounds like this workshop was very worthwhile. I think it’s easy to imagine things based upon inadvertent filtering, rather than get the real deal from direct communication, as you so rightly point out. I also think that when people are unsure, the natural tendency is to withdraw, and we’re seeing a lot of that in the marketplace. Now more than ever it’s a great time to be a contrarian. You’ll stand out more, and be that much farther ahead of the eventual upturn in the marketplace. Nice job – these anecdotes have great meaning.
Betsy Wuebker’s last blog post..ALL THE WORLD’S A STAGE . . .
I just stopped by your blog and thought I would say hello. I like your site design. Looking forward to reading more down the road.
Hi Davina,
Assumptions…ah, yes – we do make them. Just this morning, I was on my way to sit in on a quick 5 minute conference call – or I assumed it would be a 5 minute call based upon earlier discussion (while also knowing this was a difficult concept for everyone to grasp). Two hours later, I emerged. And I felt wiped out, because I hadn’t went into the meeting thinking I would be gone that long – I wasn’t mentally prepared to spend that long in this meeting. So, I was aware of the situation, and yet – I wasn’t aware of it.
Anyway, great thoughts here today Davina – and a real reason why communication is so important…
Lance’s last blog post..Money Does Grow On Trees
Assumptions! My husband told me my neighbor wanted to hike with me. I was gone over the weekend and she called him Sunday. I was excited and gave her a call about hiking. She then said she was super busy.
I assumed I’d be hiking within the next 48 hours and was disappointed!
Tess The Bold Life’s last blog post..10 Rules for a Bold & Daring Life
Davina,
I like the story about the businessman who just had to ask for orders instead of assuming his clients weren’t spending money. And boy are you right about assumptions. I like Lance’s and Tess’ examples of specific instances where they made assumptions. I have too many stories about assumptions to think of one right now!
Daphne @ Joyful Days’s last blog post..Free eBook of Personal Creeds
Something very similar happened to me too with a client. They didn’t ask for more articles simply because they were busy and distracted. All I needed to do was contact them. I am going to take on your challenge and be very aware of my assumptions!
Vered – MomGrind’s last blog post..Suffering For Beauty
Well, I’m a little late for this to count my assumptions for today, but I’ll make note of them tomorrow. It will be interesting to weave this little project throughout my day. I bet I’ll find some surprises!
For now I assume my dreams will be sweet tonight, I’ll awake refreshed and it’ll be a great day tomorrow, with me getting wonderful fulfilling work done.
Jannie Funster’s last blog post..Ukulele Video
Hi Betsy.
Thank you. You’ve made an excellent point here. Something else that was discussed in the workshop was that during an economic slowdown, those companies that are able to and choose to continue spending on marketing efforts will be the ones who stand out.
Hi Susan, and welcome.
Thanks for stopping by. I appreciate your comment.
Hi Lance.
Wow, I bet that was a long two hours. In fact, two hours is long enough for a meeting that you’ve planned to be that long. How on earth did a perceived 5-minute call turn into 2 hours? Phew. I hope there was coffee :-)
Hi Tess.
Who wouldn’t be disappointed at not getting to go hiking! Blame it on the husband. He made the assumption and you responded with natural expectation. Hmmm, does your husband hike? Send him up the mountain, lol.
Hi Daphne.
That was a good story wasn’t it? I wish I’d been more curious about what his business was.
Hi Vered.
That’s great! Let me know how it works out. It’s kind of an extra service you’re offering in one way isn’t it? Keeping them accountable for delegating their workload. They’ll probably thank you for it.
Hi Jannie.
Never too late to start. I like your approach to assuming! :-)
Love the lesson on assumptions. My professional development coach often says something like “reality is rarely as bad as what’s going on in our heads”.
Good idea going to that workshop. Making that effort and spending time with others making that effort is a great way to rekindle your hope and enthusiasm.
Sterling Okura’s last blog post..Recent Projects Built With Free Tools
Hi Davina,
That was part of the problem – I was assuming a 5 minute call, so I didn’t bring coffee with me (that would have most definitely helped!!).
We have a software solution we’re implementing – and for one particular part of it – there isn’t one solution that’s coming out as a clear cut choice – making this whole project difficult and frustrating. I’m back in a meeting on it again today – it’s scheduled at one hour long, but I’m making no assumptions that it will finish in that amount of time!!
Lance’s last blog post..Money Does Grow On Trees
Davina, as you say, making assumptions obscures the truth. And yet, the mind plays this game with the head more often than human beings realize. It is not only concerning prospective clients, but touches on fundamental views about what you are and what you have abilities to do. Thoughts and feelings are key to opening senses and experiencing an unclouded view.
Liara Covert’s last blog post..Byron Katie & 15 Stories to awaken you
What a great mid-morning read! T
Do I know what I want and am I getting it? How simple… I once read that whatever I have at this stage in my life is exactly what I wanted to have. I bristled at first. Before thought. But now I think it’s true. Because, when I break that down to daily activities, what I choose to DO moment by moment has gotten me where I am. All I have to do is assess my DO’s and make the changes.
And I WILL consider my assumptions as the day goes forth. Thanks.
Barb Hartsook @ Over Coffee’s last blog post..10 Life-Lessons I Wish I’d Known Then
Reminds me of the time I assumed my web host was getting so many calls about being down that I didn’t need to contact them. Until I lost patience, which is when I found out that only my site was down. They fixed it pronto.
I’ve made a point of continuing to make the same pattern of purchases as I had before, doing my part to return consumer confidence to its former level. And I’ve benefitted from some great sales, because businesses are wooing customers. KInd of like Warren Buffett on a small scale — he says in tough times you buy, in good times you sell.
Dot’s last blog post..I’ll Never Get Back, Part 2
Oh yes – “we make assumptions to validate our perceived reality. Our brain is wired to fill in the blanks” – ain’t that the truth!
Thinking freshly about situations is without a doubt an important life skill – thanks for the reminder, Davina!
Robin’s last blog post..What If? The Movie, A Review
Hi Sterling.
Welcome! I know what your coach means. Our minds can be our worst enemies when we let them run rampant. And boy, it is easy to do. That’s why we’ve gotta stick together. Workshops are a good way to remember that we’re not alone.
Hi Lance.
I’m smiling right now, imagining that the meeting lasts only 5 minutes this time and there you are… you’ve been to the washroom, got your coffee and you’re all set. Hope you’re not disappointed, lol.
Hi Liara.
Thank you, that is an excellent point! Your comment speaks to me of how assumptions close the door on curiosity and dull our life experience and our connection with ourselves. It really does limit us when we “pretend” we know the answer.
Hi Barb.
Thanks, I’m glad you enjoyed it. I liked reading about your process. We do apparently get all that we need, and what we can handle… so they say. I like your perspective — it is a more assertive approach. You have a good sense of your role in what you create in your life.
Hi Dot.
Lol, sorry I had to chuckle at this one. Oh, those blasted computer and Internet disruptions eh?! Well, being the squeaky wheel is a good thing sometimes. That’s great that your shopping efforts have paid off (no pun intended). Money talks, and like an old friend used to say, “it makes the world go round”… just like the squeaky wheel??? Maybe that’s a stretch but I couldn’t resist.
Hi Robin.
You’re welcome! I know I’ll sound like a broken record here… but there’s nothing fresher than the moment you’re in Now. Sound familiar? :-)
Hi Davina
I love the “Communication by Design and know what you want.” That is very important in everything that we do, we can get what we want if we don’t even know what we want to begin with.
Thank you for sharing.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action
Giovanna Garcia’s last blog post..A quiz to see what is important.
Davina!
Thank you for this solid reminder! Assumptions and fear can really lead us down a dark tunnel.
“Build relationships and value is born!” ~Henie~
Henie’s last blog post..Only If You Love Cars (Series #2)
Davina,
Thank you for sharing your workshop experience here – I sure do appreciate it.
I make lots of assumptions all the time and then burrow myself into writing and do not check them out. It is not good.
I assumed my workshops in Hawaii would be the start of something wonderful and a first little vacation after a long, long dry spell. The workshops were a bust – I assumed if the participants were paying my way I must put out my best work…instead they were just attending because required and did not pay any attention or take any hand outs or notes – they wandered the beach and ate the meals at the conference center. I just could not lighten up and by the time the 4 days of vacation rolled around I was covered in bedbug bites and serious out of commission with pneumonia.
I am also assuming I will never go back to Hawaii, as other than the lovely gardens I saw one afternoon – it was a totally miserable experience, including lost luggage and no time to look at the ocean waves (my beach view was covered up by noisy,smelly 9 story cruise ships)
patricia’s last blog post..Heeheehee!
Hi Davina – It sounds like it was a great workshop. It never ceases to amaze me how many businesses give work away just by assuming that their prospect doesn’t want to go ahead.
Some people don’t chase prospective customers up because they don’t want to feel like they’re hassling them. Then the prospect either forgets about your company completely, or gets the impression that you don’t care enough about their custom.
Now, I’m pretty good when it comes to keeping in touch with potential customers but I’m definitely guilty of making assumptions in other areas of my life and this post has reminded me to watch out for that. As you say, it’s so easy to fill in the blanks and jump to the totally wrong conclusion.
Cath Lawson’s last blog post..Does Your Sales Copy Suck?
In NLP, we work with the premise that our map of reality may be really quite different from the reality of the situation itself. Most certainly, I can vouch for the many times I have been wrong because I already have preconceived notions that are not well supported. A lot of our assumptions are made out of fear. When we can free ourselves, then we can get to experience abundance; that is our birthright.
Evelyn Lim’s last blog post..20 Funny Money Quotes
Hi Giovanna.
Thanks — I just had to laugh because your comment made me wonder how many times we assume what we want and rush forward blindly without checking in with ourselves, lol.
Hi Henie.
You’re welcome. It seems to me now that assumptions can be a symptom of fear too. Pretending to know the answer rather than finding out the truth. Assuming is lazy thinking.
Hi Patricia.
That was an unfortunate trip for you. I’m curious about the topic of the workshop. Sounds like the participants were there just for the holiday in Hawaii and not the workshop. Since they were there because it was required they just weren’t interested. You were going against the wind with them. I would want to try again with Hawaii — it really is a beautiful place. When I went over 20 years ago I came down with an infection and had to take antibiotics. I reacted to them and broke out in a rash. I had to keep myself fully covered… in Hawaii!
Hi Cath.
Yes this workshop, and particularly that story were encouraging. I’ve started to look at this differently now. I see making calls as another service offered — checking in with clients and reminding them you are there. As I mentioned to Vered, it wakes them up and keeps them accountable for their own business.
That’s great that you are staying connected. It also demonstrates to your clients that you are confident about the service/product you are offering.
Hi Evelyn.
“A lot of our assumptions are made out of fear.” That is an excellent point — thanks. When we don’t know an answer or fear the answer we make an assumption that makes us feel comfortable. I haven’t worked with NLP before but I’ve heard a lot about it. I’d like to learn more about it one day, just as I would EFT. We have so many tools don’t we?
Questioning assumptions is such a powerful thing to do. It’s absolutely amazing the limitations that we create simply by not opening our minds to other possibilities. A favorite question of mine. What else might this mean?
Tom Volkar / Delightful Work’s last blog post..Why Loving Your Work is Overrated
Hi Tom.
Assumptions are so final and contained. I like how you’ve put it that questioning our assumptions opens our minds to other possibilities. I love that question, “What else might this mean?” This feels a little like playing Russian roulette… the learning starts where the questions stop. :-)
Good story and great reminder. Assumptions are certainly often distract and get in a way. I have fallen in this trap more than once and some more. What I have learned is simple telling myself – “never assume, test it!”
Good stuff.
Alik Levin | PracticeThis.com’s last blog post..Want To Win? – Argue, Do Not Fight!
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