Positively Breathing — The Significant Victim

Life is not always fair

Sometimes we are taken advantage of. Sometimes we do all the right things, but still lose. Sometimes we act cautiously and end up getting hurt anyway.

Why do the perceived innocent suffer? Because the ego steps in to save FACE with Fear, Attachment, Control and Entitlement.

These four motives are what cause our suffering in the first place. The upkeep of the ego demands tremendous energy. While we are distracted by it and serving it, we are denying ourselves. Keeping our cool separates us from the reality of what is happening. It freezes our aliveness.

Mindful connections

When we are being mindful we are revealing our true nature. We are distinct beings, yet our ego can easily convince us this is all we are. But we are more than that — we are interconnected with each other.

We help one another and ourselves through empathic presence: listening to each others’ “story” with the five A’s — attention, acceptance, appreciation, affection and allowing. We allow ourselves to be present with what IS without adding or editing or resisting.

“… when a feeling state or an immediate experience is granted a hearing in full safety, something wonderfully opening happens. A shift occurs automatically. Once someone experiences a self-validating moment to the full, an inner permission to let go and move on is granted from deep in the psyche. Bearings are gained when the pilot has an honest view of where the ship is, no matter how lost or off course. …Anything but Yes is a handicap.” — David Richo

Yes is a mindful reply to unfairness

Through empathic presence we experience an unconditional Yes, the key to moving beyond the ego, beyond victimhood. Embracing curiosity keeps us present in what IS rather than rejecting it for our preferred version.

Feeling empathy will help us to experience our reality beyond the illusion we have created. We’ll find that the outcome is never as severe as the illusions we create. As Govinda, Hundu sage says, “We are transformed by what we accept.”

You can also embrace mindfulness with your breath by practicing this affirmation from the Breathe Easy Deck that was published earlier this week.

“I breathe in the realization that I am not my name, nor what I do for a living. I am filled with the knowledge that I am a soul traveling onward. I breathe out the illusion of being separate from All-There-Is.”

This is the final post in this Positively Breathing series. I hope you have enjoyed the journey.

The above material has been adapted and expanded on from David Richo’s The Five Things We Cannot Change… and the Happiness We Find by Embracing Them.

No questions this time. Just keep breathing — positively!

Feel free to share your comments though. Let’s dance…

Photo Credit: Saital

Tagged as: affirmations, breathe easy, breathwork, David Richo, ego, empathy, mindful, unfairness