“We hide from ‘painful’ feelings; embarrassed. If you’re an artist, a writer, a dancer, etc., express the ‘sad’. It could be your best work.”

Write the sad; right the sad

Been feeling sad lately. Well, sort of…

Denying the sadness, actually. Closing the door on it. What I’ve realized is that by closing the door I’ve locked myself in with it.

Shutting the feelings down brought me down with them. Why do we fear this place? I’ve recognized how it’s not a place I appreciate and from what I’ve seen, neither do most others when they feel it in themselves.

But man, is there a richness there when you don’t pretend it doesn’t exist. Going there is to embrace all of you in that space; to love ALL of you. Standing and reaching tall.

Live and learn; learn to live

The feelings are much larger than a child; much larger than an adult. They don’t go unwitnessed, whether you give them audience or not. They are there and you know it. Others do too, on a subtle level, and their interactions with you are coloured because of it.

It filters your perspective of others and your relations with others. Your relations with yourself. Your creativity. Being in this place is about connecting with the emotions; the elements of yourself; your nature.

The wind and fire of rage. The delicate dewdrop tears. Surrendering to the shaping of life. Standing in one’s own spotlight; self-assured.

Exploring it with heart opens the door and lets the world in. Feeling it allows you to be at home with yourself and others to be at home with you.

Life coaches tend to say that when you’re feeling low or angry it’s because you’re choosing to feel that way. I’m going take it a step farther and say that it’s because you’re choosing to NOT feel that way. You’re resisting what is there.

While on my blogging break, I’ve joined a Summer Writing Space to explore new aspects of writing and to coach my own creative space. More accurately, it’s been coaching me.

Recently, I responded to a prompt from Joanna at the Summer Writing Space to write a piece where every new line began with “I am from”. I used that prompt to give the feelings somewhere to land.

Emotions, passion and creativity are family. Don’t be afraid to feel. There are riches in these places and they are a part of your evolution. They are offering you a gift that just needs to be unwrapped. You might be surprised at what you find.

How far are you willing to reach?

Where I’m from is Elementary

I am from nothing;
do I exist?

I am from one dream; vivid…
blew in on funnel clouds,
raging, storming and swirling with life energy,
heavenly fingers pointing down from above.

I am from the embers,
glowing crimson under indigo skies,
smoldering, sparking, and
too hot to touch.

I am from a dewdrop,
tiny, delicate and glistening,
resting on the faraway tip of a quivering leaf,
paused, poised and ready to leap.

I am from frost,
out on a limb,
tinkling in the icy breath of a white April morn.

I am from the drama
that birthed me
and took me to audience;
where I waited, breathing;
no witness, no applause, no judgment.

I am from the blue clay of Terminal Creek, sculpted;
a vase styled, curvy and shaped,
a woman holding a space
to be filled.

I am from the flight of ladybug,
searching for home,
just ahead of a dream,
that blew in on funnel clouds.

How do you bring voice to your emotions?
What structure invites your creativity?
What stops you and why?
What are you waiting for?

If you care to explore your creative process, reach for your write impact.

My blogging activities may have paused, but business is still on.

Photo credits:
The picture of myself was taken by my friend, Jim.
Dewdrop is from Flickr.com by Lord V

The Empathic, Naked Soul

This morning I was overwhelmed by sadness, and for no apparent reason. I was curious because nothing was “wrong”, yet I still felt like having a good cry.

So, I let a few tears wet my cheeks, all the while wondering, “What is this feeling?” “Where has it come from?” “Why now?” The answer that came to me was this:

“You continue to evolve and grow. You have arrived at a new phase in your life, while having outgrown your old belief system. You don’t recognize who you are yet.

Everything is new and unfamiliar. Your reflection in the mirror is the same, yet something is different and you can’t quite put your finger on it.

You are mourning those parts of yourself that you have allowed to dissolve. They have simply fallen away effortlessly, and your ego’s bubble has been burst. It has no reference points.

You feel homesick for those lost parts of yourself. No matter how painful or uncomfortable they may have been, they were familiar. Your soul is now naked, the slate wiped clean, ready to start anew. You are looking for something familiar, some comfort to help you settle in. Just remember.”

Remembering the Innocence

I looked into that imaginary crystal ball, and travelled back to a place of innocence. Another place of unfolding and growth. A place of allowing, even though I wasn’t aware of it then. It was happening despite the choices I made.

I was delighted by what I remembered and bathed in this melancholy, feeling refreshed and more alive. The heaviness turned to curiosity, which in turn led me on an adventure. When I was finished, I felt home again in this new place — remembering me.

Just for fun, here are some of the things I remembered:

Watching the Waltons on Sunday evenings.
Drinking coffee with Coffee-mate — yuck!
Gathering snowy pieces of wood from the woodpile for our fireplace.
Eating Cream of Wheat cereal with lots of brown sugar.
Making onion sandwiches with white Wonder Bread and mayonnaise — yum!
Picking raspberries with my sisters down the lane.
Playing KerPlunk and Snakes and Ladders on a rainy afternoon.
Watching my grandmother wash her face with Noxzema.
The sound of popcorn being made in the kitchen.
Wagon Wheels and bologna sandwiches for lunch.
Freshly washed sheets hanging on the clothesline, frozen in the wintery breeze.
Watching my mother’s silhouette in the moonlight while she tucked me in.
My aching calves during haying season.
Wearing bell-bottoms and bangs.
Watching autumn leaves chase the school bus while it meandered along the winding roads towards school.
The sound of the frogs and crickets at night.
Resting on dirty bended knees, and smiling while watching tadpoles wiggle around in mud puddles.
Climbing a tree, barefoot and feeling safely hidden by its whispering leaves.
Laying on in the cool green grass, watching wispy clouds sail across the sky.

Melancholy is Becoming You

Memories and melancholy danced in my thoughts. Instead of avoiding my sadness, instead of running from it or pretending it didn’t exist I played in the sandbox. The sands of time if you may, brought me home.

I remembered pieces of my childhood, memories that brought me validation of having “been somewhere”. Memories that honoured my innocence. I felt on the brink of something new.

There is humility in allowing and witnessing the unfolding of yourself. There is courage and comfort in stepping outside of yourself to take an admiring glance at how far you’ve come. Remember?

We’re constantly growing even when we’re not aware of it. When the unknown, or unfamiliar may feel a little overwhelming, turn around and see from where you’ve come. See your footprints. You are on a path.

Go ahead, pat yourself on the back. Look at how far you have come. And wonder what is ahead. Be curious. There is courage in not always knowing where you are headed. Encourage the unfolding; trust it.

Loving who you were will ignite inspiration to move you forward into the unknown. It will connect you with a space in time where you loved who you were; when you loved where you were. Love where you are now because someday you will look back upon this time and this memory for sustenance.

What memories do you have that make you feel whole in your life now?

What gives you that boost to keep going when you feel a little lost or overwhelmed at the newness you’ve discovered in yourself?

What new memories have you made today?

Photo credit: Morning Glory

Today, I am happy to introduce you to a friend of mine. Sara Healy writes a personal development blog called The Sharing Connection where the tagline is “A place to connect and share things learned in this journey through life.”

She says on her Welcome page that, “This is a place you can visit to feel motivated and encouraged, or to discover a new way of looking at something. It’s a place to laugh and share about our everyday life lessons.”

She definitely has a knack for connecting the dots between then and now, and sharing what she has learned on her way. Sara writes to remind herself what she has learned and hopes that her readers will take away a new perspective to help themselves through their own life challenges.

The most important goal she has for her blog is that readers come to life in the comment section and share their experiences, thoughts and ideas with one another.

She writes about such subjects as Zen Gift Giving, Persistence – A Key to Success, Giving the Gift of An Open Heart, and How to Practice Mindfulness While Driving. And so, without further ado here is Sara.

A language that needs no translation

I volunteer as a tutor for the English as a Second Language (ESL) program in my community. One day while waiting for my student, I noticed an Asian woman talking excitedly on the phone. She was smiling and obviously full of joy and happiness.

How did I know this? I didn’t understand a single word she was saying and yet, I understood exactly what she was feeling.

While this has happened many times before, it was the first time I was really aware of it. It made me think about how we communicate. And suddenly, it hit me. Emotions are our universal language — we get the message even though we can’t speak, write or read the language.

Communicating without translation

Think about this for a second. No matter where you are in the world, you can understand an emotional response from another person. It may be related to a situation, but you can sense what that person is feeling without having to translate their words.

Our emotions connect us in a most powerful way, IF we pay attention to them.

Unfortunately, many of us have been taught to avoid our emotions and those of others. Consequently, we don’t often communicate with each other on an emotional level. We’ve been taught to put up barriers that keep us away from each other.

This is especially true when we’re dealing with people who don’t share our beliefs, whether they are social, religious or cultural. We focus on our differences and don’t allow ourselves to connect emotionally with people of certain ethnic backgrounds, religions, ages, or whatever we feel threatened by.

The more we do this, the more we forget what we have in common and we lose the ability to connect with each other. This is where I ask you to take a leap of faith with me and consider something a bit radical.

What if we stripped away the barriers; the societal and cultural beliefs that keep us from each other? What if we learned to use the language of emotions to communicate with those we love and those we call our enemies. What if by acknowledging that we FEEL the same things — love, desire, joy, anger, envy, happiness, awe — we can connect with each other in a more compassionate and caring way?

Is it possible that this might be the most powerful thing we could do to save our world?